The Human Connection Muscle

For years I was waiting to “find” my passion.

Twiddling my thumbs, just waiting for it to magically appear… 

It turns out, that’s not how it works. Not even close. We don’t FIND our passions, we must DEVELOP them (see Don’t Follow Your Passion). We go out in the real world and get our hands dirty. 

We try out a bunch of things — and see what we like and what we don’t.

The same idea applies to connecting with people and developing a… (dare I say) “network.” Eh, let’s instead use the word “community”. 

A now-famous 80-year-old Harvard Study showed that embracing community helps us live longer and be happier. Per the study’s director, “The surprising finding is that our relationships and how happy we are in our relationships has a powerful influence on our health.”

Put simply, the people in our lives play a HUGE role in our happiness. 

But the wild part is… we don’t always seek out these new connections. We often have the friendships we naturally “found”, instead of intentionally “developed” new ones. 

As much as I cherish my solo thinking and recharging time, I LOVE connecting with new interesting people. The most recurring items in my daily gratitude journal — are all the amazing people in my life. 

Connecting with people is something I’ve done pretty much my whole life. But one of my FAVORITE things is to play the connector role with other people. The best is introducing two people who end up being friends, business partners, or even romantic partners. 😘 

And it’s MUCH easier to play the connector role, after developing tons of existing genuine connections. 

Exercising Human Connection 

If someone wants to improve their writing, they write more. 

If someone wants to improve their health, they exercise more. 

If someone wants to improve their human connections, they connect with more people.

I personally am optimizing for all three. However, I realized that I have targets for the first two, but not the third. 

So I am adding one right now. Each week I’ll meet with one person (brand new or weak ties) to create or strengthen the relationship. And maybe see how I can help.

My default day for this will be Friday mornings. 10am to 10:20am CT. I’m of course flexible with schedules, but the more default rules I can set up to start, the easier it is to follow. 

So maybe I sent YOU this link directly. Or maybe you found it on my blog. Either way, let’s have a virtual coffee for 20 minutes (or even IRL). 

Here’s my calendar, grab a Friday morning slot (or really whenever works best for you)!

Ps. No agenda, no rules. We can talk about anything. 

PPS. But I’m always curious what you like to do for fun or what you’re currently experimenting with. Bonus points if I can help with anything. 🙂